[ale] Microsoft Works (humor)

[Bob]

Computer Science: solving today's problems tomorrow.

Hit any user to continue.

If your computer says, "Printer out of Paper," this problem cannot resolved
by continuously clicking the "OK" button.

Intel: We put the "um..." in Pentium.

Tech Support Tip #2:  When the support agent says "Click...", wait for the
rest of the sentence.

Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.

Managing programmers is like herding cats.

Intel Inside:  The world's most commonly used warning label.

A television may insult your intelligence, but nothing rubs it in like
a computer!!!!

A computer scientist is someone who, when told to "Go to Hell," sees the 
"go to," rather than the destination, as harmful.

FATAL ERROR! SYSTEM HALTED! - Press any key to do nothing...

Microsoft Windows:  Proof that P.T. Barnum was correct.

If a train station is where the train stops, what is a work station?

Customer:  "I'm running Windows '98"
Tech: "Yes."
Customer:  "My computer isn't working now."
Tech: "Yes, you said that."

Windows isn't a virus, viruses do something

Error #152 - Windows not found: (C)heer (P)arty (D)ance

A computer without a Microsoft operating system is like a dog without
bricks tied to its head.

Your mouse has moved. Windows NT must be restarted for the change to
take effect. Reboot now?  [OK]